Gleaming sunset
by Kadesch
Summary: When Jane and Lisbon are driving along the coast the sun is beginning to set. With all the sudden memories Jane just knows he has to do something that might change the life of both of them forever but he can't wait any longer. Set in the middle of season 6.


_So, I'm finally doing it, I'm posting one of the storys that has been living on my computer for a while. But especially at the moment I'm sure I'm not the only one in desperate need for some pure Jisbon fluff and no Pike in sight._

_Please excuse my English, it's not my mother tongue and I'm really out of practise (in writing and especcially in writing a story in English). Hope you still get the gist and enjoy a little fluff! ;-)_

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Jane had been back a few months when they were back in California, back in Malibu for a case. He liked working with the FBI, having some intellectual challenge again. But the most important thing was that he was back on Lisbons side. Of cause it was different. She wasn't his boss anymore and they were working with a different team but he was back with her and that was the thing that counts. Although he sometimes missed good old CBI…

After having interviewed some suspects outside of the city Jane and Lisbon where driving back to their hotel. They went there on one of Janes hunches and it seemed like it paid off. Maybe they could wrap up the case tomorrow. As they were on their way along the coast the sun was beginning to set. Jane felt how Lisbon tensed a little. The scenery was just too familiar…

His chest tightened as he remembered what he had done to her more than two years ago when he was blinded by his need for revenge. He remembered how he wasn't able to look at her when he left her behind, knowing what was about to come. To see all those feelings in her eyes, knowing he was going to crash them, to hurt her. The one woman who meant more to him than anyone else.

He looked over. Lisbon was looking out the window very concentrated. But he felt how much she was effected by the scenery. He was able to feel how she suffered remembering that day and he felt more sorry then ever for the things he did to her in all those years. She always tried to help him, forgave him all the things he had done to her. Oh, she deserved so much more.

So he made a decision. When he spotted next scenic lookout he pulled over and stopped the car. Lisbon turned to him.

"What are you doing?" He saw signs of panic in her eyes.

"I wanted to watch the sunset. Come with me?"

She looked at him like he was slightly out of his mind. Did he even see panic in her eyes? His chest tightened.

"I prefer to stay in the car. I became to hate sunsets. The last time a guy invited me to watch the sunset with him, it didn't turn out so well…"

The pain shot straight into his heart.

"Lisbon, please get out of the car with me. Trust me."

She couldn't help but snort. How often had she heard that sentence? But when she looked up into his face she saw his pleading eyes. She still hesitated but after a few minutes she reached for the door handle. They got out of the car and he guided her to the shore with his hand on the small of her back.

After standing there, watching the sunset for a few minutes, Jane began to speak.

"I'm so happy to be back." He said almost not audible.

"It's good to have you back."

"Thanks for taking the FBI offer…"

"Well I couldn't risk that you take down the whole FBI. It would have been a risk for national security."

He chuckled. "Must be a big sacrifice."

She smirked. "Well, kind of..."

They silenced and watched the sun setting and the sky showing the most beautiful colours. Jane still had his hand on her back, moving his thumb up and down her spine to comfort her. He signed and she thought he wanted to say something but nothing happened. After a while she turned her head slightly. He was beautiful in this light but it remembered her of the time when he left her standing there at the beach. She felt so betrayed back then, so hurt. He had never used her feelings against her before. Back then he did. And she was sure, he knew about them although she did everything not to show. An uncomfortable feeling rose within her and she just wanted to leave this place, go to her hotel room and get herself back together.

"OK, this was nice, can we leave now?"

"Not yet, Lisbon, please give me some more minutes."

No, she wanted to get away.

"I'll wait by the car." At least he won't be able to leave her behind this way although it was an irrational fear…

She was about to turn away when he called her back and grabbed her hand.

"Wait Lisbon, please!"

She turned back to him: "Why, Jane, why?"

"Please. Just give me another minute. I… I need another minute… I'm a little bit shy at the moment."

"Shy? Who are you and what did you do to Patrick Jane?"

He had to chuckle but turned serious again when he looked into her eyes.

"Yeah, it happens. Not every often so. But… Oh man…" he ran his hand through his hair and looked back at the sunset. "I just don't know where to start… I'm afraid, Lisbon. Afraid, I'll ruin everything I've left. I can't… but I…"

"Jane you're rambling and you don't make a lot of sense at the moment…"

He turned back to her, now taking both of her hands between his looking at them.

"I'm sorry. OK…" He took a deep breath and lifted his gaze to her eyes. "OK here we go. I'll just start here: I know you're remembering the day I left you in a similar situation as well as I do. I know I never hurt you as bad as I did that day and I can't even begin to explain how sorry I am for that. I know you won't really want to hear this but I hurt myself that day as well. It was the hardest thing I've ever done after opening the door the day I found my family. But I was quite sure back then that there was a big chance I wouldn't get out of the situation alive and I didn't want to put you in danger neither I wanted you to see me being killed…"

"Your only fear was that I might stop you…"

"I have to admit a part of me was afraid of that too. On the other hand I didn't want you to see me kill him. It would have been a picture you'd never get out of your head again."

"But I know you killed him!"

"Knowing is completely different from seeing."

"But you wouldn't have cared if I'd found you dead?"

He was silent for a moment looking down at their hands again. He was stroking the back of her hand with his thumb. What was he supposed to say?

"I was blinded back then. But when I killed him for real, when I was sitting on him with the gun in my hand… There was a second there when I wanted to end things. But when I lifted the gun your face came to my mind and I knew I'd never be able to do that to you."

He intended to show her how much she meant to him by telling her this but she got angry. She took away her hands and took a few steps back, putting her hands on her hips.

"How nice of you! So you ran off to a foreign country, leaving me and the team with all the mess instead of taking the responsibility for what you've done."

His hand went up to his neck massaging it like he had a sore spot there. He was nervous and uncomfortable but he had to try to explain it to her. "I didn't see any other way. If I ever wanted to find myself again I had to get away. Like I said: I was completely blinded back then."

"And what's different now? You came back, blackmailing the FBI, shanghaiing you're way and playing the same old games." Her eyes were gleaming with anger.

"But that's not what I want anymore!"

"Then what do you want, Jane? What do you want?"

He dropped his hand and almost shouted: "You! I just want you!"

The wind was out of her sails at that, confusion was showing in her eyes. "Me? What's that's supposed to mean?"

"You're everything I have left, Lisbon. Everything that matters to me. I wasn't able to stop thinking about you when I was back on that island. I was lost in paradise cause I missed you so much. I had to think about all those times I was able to touch you and I regretted so much that I never told you what I really feel for. I wasn't lying back then at the beach. You really have no idea how much you mean to me!"

His gaze wandered down to his left hand and when hers followed his she saw that he was getting a hold of his wedding ring.

"I want to move on Lisbon, start a new life. And I know the only person I'll ever be able to find happiness with again is you. There's no one who knows me like you do. Knows the worst side of my but still stays at my side. Trying to save me although I always wanted to safe you."

He pulled the ring off his finger and lifted it between them for one last look before he put it in his jacket pocket. He captures her hands with his again and lifted them to his lips, kissing her chuckles ever so lightly.

"I'd be the happiest man if you let me make up for all the pain I caused you, for all the times I did you wrong. I promise I'll never leave you again! I know you deserve better and I know I'm not worth it but I can't go one without at least trying!" He pulled their hand to his chest where she was able to feel is hard beating in a crazy rhythm. "What do you say?"

Her gaze had followed their joined hands and she needed a moment to lift them back to his eyes.

"Why now Jane? You've been back for months. Why are you doing this now?"

He took a deep sign and his gaze wandered off to the sunset again. It was almost done, the darkness slowly increasing.

"You never tried to find me."

"What?"

He turned back to her.

"You never tried to find me when I was gone. When I was in Las Vegas I understood that you didn't come for me since I never reacted to any calls or texts. I had no right to expect you to do it. When I was lying in my bed at night, asking myself if it was worth the torture I wished you'd do it anyway. When I was bailed out of prison, when Lorelei knocked at my door part of my heart hoped it was you although my head was happy that my plan worked and my head shot off my heart again. Within the last two years I was able to write you those letters but I didn't hear anything of you. That was a real torture. Not knowing what you were up to, not hearing your voice, not seeing you. I tried to start a new life, be happy, but I couldn't without you. Of cause you didn't know where I was but part of me hoped you'd try to write or call me or be there suddenly. I know it was dull but when I was lying in my bed at night or sitting on the beach I dreamed of you appearing out of nowhere..."

"I never would have risked your freedom…"

"I know. Like I said, I understand why you didn't do it but part of me just hoped for it…"

"But why are you telling me all this now?"

"I always knew you cared for me, Lisbon. But I never allowed myself to find out if there was more then friendship. I mean I needed two years in loneliness before I really realised what I really felt for you…" Be lifted her hand up to his face again, resting them on his cheek. She felt the stubbles on his cheek. "When I noticed both of us remembering our last stop at the beach in the car I understood that it's time to stop being coward. Just because I'm afraid to loose you if you don't feel the same way I can't hide my feelings forever. And you just deserve to know no matter what."

He planted a light kiss on the back of her hand, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. When he pushed down their hand he opened them again. She never saw so much emotion showing in his beautiful eyes, his gorgeous face. His lips trembled slightly and when he spoke his voice was just above a low whisper.

"I love you, Teresa, with all my heart. And I'd be the happiest man on earth if you'd return my feelings."

She swallowed. She couldn't believe it. Patrick Jane was declaring his love.

"Sorry, what did you say? I was kind of hyped up…" she said, her eyes sparkling.

"Oh, you mean…" were the last words he said before he pressed his lips on hers gently. Her lips where as smooth as he had imagined. His hands framed her head and she wrapped her arms around him. Her lips were intoxicating. He let his tongue slide across her lower lips and she immediately opened up to him. The passion between them increased as they finally tasted each other and he hesitated when she tried to pull back slowly. She had to smile as he leaned into her again to capture her lips again and again.

"Wait… Patrick … wait" she chuckled in between his kisses. He growled when she finally broke their kiss.

"Patrick…"

"Enough talking, more kissing!" He tried to kiss her again but she took a step back.

"Just one second!" He growled again but she took his chin and forced him to look in her eyes again. "I love you, too, Patrick. I can't even remember a time when I wasn't in love with you!"

He pulled her to his chest, took her in his arms and sealed her mouth with his lips again. After a few minutes he pulled back and put his forehead on hers. The sun was gone by now and they where standing there in the soft gleam of a full moon and sparkling stars.

"Do you want to go back to the hotel now?"

She signed. "No, let's stay just a little longer. It's so beautiful here."


End file.
